I like the fall, it’s my favorite season. I consider myself a fall person more than a summer person. You get to wear layers, scarves, cardigans, all kinds of fun stuff. I think I look good in layers. Also, I wear tight pants so it’s hard to fit everything in my pockets.

We took the Amtrak train to Boston on Sunday. Sarah, Debbie, Kari, Craig, Dave, Julio-jitsu and myself. Kari’s parents treated us like honored guests and fed us delicious cornbread. I limped around on a bum heel and ate suspicious (but free) Chinese buffet food at Howard Johnson’s. I didn’t meet Ben Affleck.

My phone died. It keeps typing TTTTTTTTTTTTT, etc. My fifth one in about a year.

Now we’re back in the city. Back home. Anyway, another poem. I wrote it stumbling back to Kari’s parent’s house. I don’t know.

I Saw the Edge of Winter Coming

I saw the edge of winter coming,
have you seen it in the leaves?
The green has turned to auburn
and summer’s love is left bereaved

  I saw smoke in the sky,
  but I didn’t know from whence it came
  I closed my eyes to forget,
  but even blind I felt the same
  And despite what I had heard,
  time did nothing to dull the pain
  But it robbed me of my strength
  and left my spirit frail and lame

    I saw something last night
    that made my eyes begin to tear
    I heard a distant rumbling
    that made my heart shake with fear
    I heard a mournful trumpet pealing
    and saw dark clouds were drawing near.
    I rubbed my eyes to chase the darkness
    but knew the sky would never clear.

I saw the edge of winter coming,
have you seen it in the leaves?
I’ve seen the summer’s maiden bawling
sobbing as she grieved.

I saw the edge of winter coming.

Have you seen it?

Have you seen it?

I dreamt of you last night.

Not the type of dream that children have,
or old men have, or even those of teenage boys.

Not any type of dream I’ve ever dared to dream before.

This was a different thing for a different time.

I don’t know quite what it means,
but I dreamt of you.

It’s been a while since I’ve posted a new Pickabar tune, hasn’t it? I’ve been busy working on 45 Adapters recordings and haven’t had much time to dedicate to writing. Believe it or not, I actually went through a period of about eight days without even playing guitar.

You know, the symbolism of a bundle of rods tied together has been ruined by it’s association with fascism, but it still represents an essential truth about life. We can accomplish so much more when we work together than we ever could alone. If we work together without our egos getting in the way, there’s no reason we can’t win!

Most people don’t get that and instead they lose themselves in the modern cult of the individual. Don’t get me wrong, individuality is great. Thinking for yourself is important too. At the same time, what could be more powerful than a bunch of strong individuals whose goals align deciding to work together?

Some of my song ideas come in a flash, like an involuntary reaction.

Some of my song ideas are like grains of sand in an oyster. They start out as nothing, but they stay bumping around in the jumble of odds and ends that I call a mind like an unwelcome house guest.

Some of my songs start out as an experiment. “We Can Win!” is the third type.

No guest appearances this time. Maybe next time you’ll play with me?

We Can Win

Most people walk through life drunk with self-centeredness, not us.
Most people stare at the mirror all day, not us.
And at the end of the day all they’ve got to show is bitterness, not us.
When they try to work together ego always gets in the way, not us.

  So I can’t see why we can’t win
  I can’t see why we can’t win
  If we stand together, just us and our friends
  I can’t see why we can’t win

They think they’ll find a way to break through our bonds, they won’t.
They think their allies will stand with them against us, they won’t.
And if they think they’ll find a way to outlast our resolve, they won’t.
When they’re asked to give of themselves for the greater good, they won’t.

  I can’t see why we can’t win
  I can’t see why we can’t win
  If we never consider surrendering
  I can’t see why we can’t win

[Download MP3]

I always admired and appreciated the nuggets of wisdom that my grandmother would share with me as a child. There was one things she used to say, thought, that has only begun to really make sense to me now. “I wonder what ever happened to shame?”, she would ask. “People have forgotten hot to be ashamed and they have almost forgotten how to be embarrassed.”

She’d often talk about how the world had changed and people no longer believed in shame. She thought that the world had become a great deal more mean spirited and selfish because of it. In my infinite teenage wisdom, I thought that she was just too old fashioned to appreciate the freedom and possibilities afforded to us in the brave new world where everyone could do what they wanted to do without the burden of silly old fashioned shame. As I get older and hopefully at least a little bit wiser, I’ve started to understand just how right she was.

Last night, Sarah and I were jogging on a narrow sidewalk when we came up behind a mother and her young daughter. The daughter was dressed in a catholic school girl uniform and the mother was dressed in modest clothes. I pride myself on leaping to conclusions, so unsurprisingly I jumped out on a limb and guessed that this is a woman who has decided to give her daughter every possible advantage even though she has modest means. This was a woman to be admired!

As we got closer to the pair we began to politely (and admittedly somewhat breathlessly) say, “excuse us”. “Excuse us, ma’am! Excuse, us please.” Did this woman who I had just been admiring gesture her daughter to the side so that we could pass? On the contrary she stopped moving and shot me a dirty look. We actually made eye contact and she refused to move. We had to squeeze by them, nearly touching them. For people who don’t know me personally, I am a pudgy 6’2” 260 lbs fellow. If I hadn’t made those evasive maneuvers, if I hadn’t been nice enough to slow down to a near standing stop, either of the two could have been hurt. But there they stood.

I loudly stated to the Sarah and the world, “I wonder why people raise their children to have no manners?” I usually try to avoid confrontation, especially over small incidents of inconsiderate behavior, but this really annoyed me. It shouldn’t have, but it did.

As we continued to run, my mind wandered. I started to imagine a future where this little girl was now an all-knowing teenager continuing to do inconsiderate things. I pictured her doing something inconsiderate and possibly future destroying like dating a meth dealing biker. I could almost hear her mother giving the generic mother “I didn’t raise you to behave like that”. Then, “shazam!”, I would pop up out of nowhere and say, “you didn’t?”

It’s all well and good to pay to have your child attend a great school, to expose them to your faith and the positive effects you believe it has. To feed them the best food you can afford. To dote on them and to provide them with the tools and the self belief that can allow them to have a successful life. But, what’s the point if you don’t treat them to have a little common courtesy for their fellow man?

Now, I’m not a parent, but I am a know-it-all. I can’t imagine that teaching your kids to not care about other people, to not be willing to even step an inch to the side to let them pass as they politely excuse themselves, is a good thing. In fact, I think it’s something that this mother should be ashamed of.

So there, my contribution to more shame in the world!

p.s. Congratulations to Lisa and Pete on their wedding. I had a great time!

"No matter what anyone says, no matter the excuse or explanation, whatever a person does in the end is what he intended to do all along."

- Cus D’Amato

Here’s a new 45AD interview for those of you who don’t get enough of my ramblings here in pickabarland.

More substantial blog posts soon!